November 20th, 2017 A induced vaginal birth story of Miles Scott Jeffrey born 1:46pm, weighing 6lbs & 9oz, 19in.
A quick back story of our pregnancy journey – that is another post all together. After five years of marriage Jared and I decided we were ready to start our family. After college, starting our careers, taking a few fun trips and buying our forever home a family was the next step in our lives together. To be honest even after five years of marriage and twenty five years of life I was still terrified of the thought of children.
Early March 2017 our last trip before starting our family Jared and I headed out to Orlando to Walt Disney World somewhere Jared or I had never been. That trip will always be special to us for many reason. The biggest reason we discovered just a few weeks later and if you get where I’m going with this – I was pregnant! Very much to our surprise we had become pregnant with our sweet boy a little faster than we expected. We were shocked, scared, overwhelmed but incredibly thankful and over joyed. I had so many fears of struggle and I will always be grateful for God’s control and perfect timing. – To all the mothers that have struggled and that our still struggling you will always lay in my prayers.
Now down to the nitty gritty. The season had turned to fall and November had finally came. A countdown that seemed to take a lifetime and ironically enough our sweet baby was not due until the very last day of November. Being a first time mom I had no idea what to expect even after many question, lots of late night research and all the preparing I could mentally and physically do it was the same story over and over. EVERY SINGLE PREGNACY IS DIFFERENT. Which means EVERY SINGLE LABOR AND DELIVERY IS DIFFERENT.
When I hit 37 weeks my doctor started discussing a birth plan with us. He encouraged an induction and “a girls best friend” -an epidural. When he aloud us to pick a date for our sons birth I felt relieved. The control freak in me loved the idea of waking up, checking into the hospital and knowing I was having a baby that day. However my excitement was tainted several times by the moms who seem to think every labor and delivery must be the same because as soon as I said the word induction. The faces. The “oh honey”. “Induction slow your labor down” , “Inductions make your labor so much harder”. You name it I probably heard it. My thoughts on this – I’m sorry if your induction or your sister Sally’s was a bad experience but when encouraged by someone who has spent their life delivering babies says its a good idea I’m going to side with them and once again every delivery is different so to expect our experiences to be the same or even similar is just crazy. Instead of being negative try encouraging words to the terrified first time mom. Be that hype girl.
Our date was set November 20th, 2017 we were set to check in at six am sharp to start my induction process. I honestly remember thinking the night before I would never sleep. I did in fact sleep, maybe God’s way of telling me to get it while I could but I was so tired I remember sleeping so hard before our 4:45 alarms sounded. In a blur we were up, packed, gave a few last minute loves to our first child -our dog Argo and we were out the door.
It was a chilly November morning, still dark outside as we made our way into the hospital to check in. The process started with checking vitals, setting us up in our delivery room- its so nice to labor and deliver in the same room. I think it differs between hospitals. The first step was starting my IV and the Pitocin. An hour or so later around eight am my doctor came in to break my water. At this point I had no pain just light cramping and some tightening in my stomach due to the contractions the Pitocin had helped kick start. The breaking of my water on the other hand was a very odd and slightly painful experience. All I’m going to say about the breaking of my water was wow at the amount of water. At the point of my water breaking I was dilated a 3- which is what I had checked in at. I was already accustomed to having lower pressure from being dilated and carrying my boy super low so honestly I was not in any real pain when the nurse came in to tell me my epidural was here.
In my head I thought I’m actually okay I think I could wait a little while. I told the nurse I was feeling fine and that I could wait. She encouraged me to go ahead in case the anesthesiologist left the floor and I could miss my window to receive the epidural. Again being a first time mom I thought “say no more” I went ahead and trusted the people that once again do this every day. The epidural hurt. It was a strange feeling. I did not die or cry but it was painful. And wow at the feeling of being numb from the waste down. I honestly could not feel a thing. It was not a painful feeling it was like my lower body was a sleep. I could still feel light contractions even on the monitor when Jared would say “that’s a big one, can you feel that” – he found it amazing I couldn’t feel anything.
At this point we had many visitors in our room. Our moms, Jared’s aunt and first cousin and my best friend to keep us company and our minds occupied. I enjoyed laboring with family in the room. Maybe not if I was in super pain but once again wow at the epidural. Having that conversation even if it was just listening to them talk amongst them selves kept Jared and I from nervously biting our nails and worrying our brains. – We were so thankful for that support.
1:00 rolled around and Jared was pacing the floors. The nurse had not been in to check me – dilations not just general check in since 10:30. My contractions on the monitor had been strong & consistent pretty much the whole day and Jared had been watching the monitor like a hawk and felt no way I hadn’t made more progress. He was anxious to know how close we were. I started feeling like my legs were getting wet. To myself I thought the contractions were pushing more water out from getting stronger and stronger. So I told Jared to go ahead and get the nurse.
Our nurse, who shared a name with my mom and has a grandchild names Miles- I thought that was a neat coincidence came in to check me before we could even call for her. She pops in and says she’s ready to check me. -This was no coincidence as she was watching the monitor for changes that we did not know to look for. Miles heartrate had started to drop meaning he was starting to drop into the canal. Once again she knew better than we did and this was not her first rodeo. Our family steps out and she checks to see how far I have now dilated. To my surprise what I thought was water was actually blood – The bloody show to moms on the internet. This is a total normal step in delivery. To my even bigger surprise she says okay we are ready, we need to call the doctor in. I can only imagine my eyes were as big a quarters and looked like a deer in the headlights. My expression followed with “I’m a 10” “do we need to turn the epidural up” – my fear of the pain had finally kicked in.
The nurse stepped outside and informed our family that it was go time to go in and say their well wishes and head to the waiting room. Jared and I decided a long time ago we only wanted it to be the two of us in the delivery room. This was a moment we only wanted to share between the two of us. The last moments as just the two of us. -sorry mom.
This will be the most graphic of my content so to be warned. Our family left the room and the nurses came in to set everything up. They turned the hospital bed into a completely different contraptions. Those things have buttons and levers I never knew existed on a bed. After sitting me into the right position the nurse ask me to do some practice pushes. A new method for first time moms to show them how to properly push. After a couple pushes she ask me to stop and ask Jared if he wanted to see Miles head and that he had hair. The funny part and why I’m sharing this intimate detail is because the look on my husband of five years face. It was like he was asking for permission without words. I just shook my head. I will never forget the look on his face as he was not looking at me or my body but as he was seeing his son even just a small part of him for the first time. The nurse then asked if I wanted to see a mirror. To be honest this question mortified my very thoughts. I was more hesitate than Jared to see my body in this form. However with fear of regret I did. I looked. Wow at the human body. Wow at a woman’s power. Wow at modern medicine. I will never regret that mirror. It was like a shot of motivation in sight. I saw him and I wanted him. After nine months of carrying my son, he was right there and I was ready to have him in my arms. The thought of pain or the thought of my body and what it was going through did not matter anymore.
Moments later in walks my doctor. He gently pats my knee and says “this happened faster than I thought it would” I replied with “you are telling me”. After a few pushes with the coaching of my doctor and nurses within moments our sons body emerges. It was almost an out of body experience. I remember my doctor saying one more good hard push and with everything in me doing so and as I opened my eyes almost blacked out and seeing spots I saw the most beautiful sight my eyes will ever see. My son. He was tiny, he was pale, he was not crying like in movies and tv shows but he was here he was finally here. They laid him on my chest and if I could relive any moment for the rest of my life it would be that moment. His tiny perfect body laid on my chest as the first boy I ever loved cut his cord as proud as I had ever seen him. Oh the look in his eyes seeing his son for the first time was so beautiful. I never seen my husband look more beautiful and happy as that moment. I fell overwhelmingly deeper in love with him in that very moment.
After they had clamped his cord they took him over to check him and clean him off. They informed us he had swallowed some fluid on the way out and we need to suction his lungs and try to keep him crying. After a few minutes his soft whimpers turned into a few good cries. They handed me my beautiful boy. His bare skin laid against my bare skin, with the brightest eyes I had ever seen he gazed up at me as if he knew exactly who I was. I knew exactly who he was. He was my purpose in this life. No matter what I did or who I would become if the only thing I was in this world was his mother that was enough.
November 20th, 2017 at 1:46pm our lives changed forever. Our greatest blessing. We became parents. We became three.
Soon we will become four. Our love will grow. I will see my husband become a father for the second time. I will see my son become a big brother. I will cherish Miles birth till my last day. I am excited and nervous to experience birth for the second time. Banks Conrad Jeffrey will join our family next Wednesday July 24th via induction (unless he decides otherwise). I can’t wait to start your story B.